When it comes to relationships and dating, there is a big difference between American and French women. French women are more open to accepting and enjoying what is, as opposed to American women who focus on perfection or try to achieve it. French women are proud of their femininity and individuality, without having to worry about what others think. They will do what makes them happy, regardless of whether it is in line with social conventions. They accept their men as they are.
In her book What French Women Knew: The About Love, Sex and Other Matters of the Heart and Mind, Debra Ollivier compares and contrasting the differences between American and French females. These differences are rooted in one thing: France has no rules about love, sex, or how to dress, look, or act. The American rulebook dictates how women should manage a relationship with men, from their first meeting through to marriage, divorce, and dating. French women are open to accepting whatever is offered. They act and believe that life is short and that time is a waste. They have a sense that everything is happening right now, which can translate into a positive outlook for American women.
French women embrace individuality and celebrate it, rather than shying away. They are open to their femininity, accept imperfections, and make their own rules. While there are many generalizations, at least one truth to them all.
Ollivier discusses cultural differences that may be advantageous for American women to adopt. The author claims that the French culture gives women a strong sense and confidence. This is because it is different from the American way of life. Similar to American women who are used to structure and rules, French women can be comfortable with uncertainty.
French people are also more discrete. They are less communicative in their culture, especially at a personal level. Your personal information is kept secret. A French woman might appear charming and attractive, but an American woman could interpret it as arrogant or bitchy. You may not be able to read a Frenchman unless you have a French woman.
France is different from America in that it’s okay to be unhappy. The U.S. puts so much pressure on us to be happy, it can make our lives miserable. American women associate happiness with perfection. We don’t have to change our lives, but we can work on improving our mates. French women understand that relationships are more than just checking your bank account. It is impossible to force love and sex into perfect 50/50 shares. These women know that cohabitation requires consideration, cooperation and compatibility.
French people live by the motto “carpe diem”. They live their lives with an acute awareness of the difficulties and pleasures life can bring and the realization of how precious life is. This may be the most important lesson we take away in this book. Contrary to American women’s constant quest for perfection, the French philosophy is more about savoring the moment and devil-may-care.
American women can learn one thing from this book: We should accept ourselves as we are, and not worry about what other people think. We would be better off developing a genuine affection for men than competing with them. Everyone can win by calling a truce during the battle of the sexes.